leadership development

I am already 45, and my life is over. It is too late for me to love, start something, change, give birth, make money, travel, breathe deeply, divorce, get married, go to the party, go to restaurants, study, and make friends. This list can go on forever.

At first, I thought this was a problem for people like me - born in Soviet times and grown up after many Eastern European countries broke away from the big RED. But, BTW, particular studies confirm this theory.

I only became interested in psychology and coaching once I learned how much our childhood influences the rest of our life. But what we have learned in childhood predetermines our actions later. 

Let's take a simple example. There is a little girl who has a lot of toys. And then, suddenly, her granny decides to give her toy to a neighbouring girl from a low-income family. 

She doesn't discuss it with the child but takes her doll and gives it to this girl. But, of course, she has several more dolls, so what's the big deal? 

I often think about what is behind a person's desire to impose their point of view. Is this an attempt to amuse their ego? The urge to assert themselves and pat themselves on the back, "how good am I"?

⠀Usually, low self-esteem and intolerance of other people's opinions are generally behind this.

⠀Can we talk about accepting and respecting the interlocutor's opinion in this case? Nope. A person who agrees with the diversity of the world and the people in it will never shove their valuable "how it should be, or I know better" into you.

Helena looked silently after Andrew. It seemed to her that her world had collapsed. She had no idea how she would live or what she would do; she just wanted to lie down and die.

⠀"So what if he went away every Friday for a weekend vacation with his friends? So what if he didn't help out around the house, and he couldn't because he was tired at work? I'm not as tired at work as a woman; women don't get tired; they can't. How will I be without him now? How?"

⠀Well, hello, Mrs Codependency. One person did the wrong thing, and the other person's day isn't going well.

Every now and again, you may bump into a situation where suddenly, and seemingly out of nowhere; you stop hitting your goals; you seem to be a little distracted.

You may feel burned out and overwhelmed.

Part of that comes from the intensity to follow through on a goal. That can take up much energy, you know, that mental focus of being able to stick with it.

You may find that you are entirely unfocused. You may say to yourself things like; I don't know, I'm just feeling burnt out, I don't see through, what's the next step, and so on.

I was inspired to create this post by a client - the managing director of the EU country's local offices for a large technology colouring company. Perhaps I should ...